Systemic Family Constellations and the Knowing Field

How we can heal and evolve by rendering the invisible visible

Each one of is created by a sperm and an egg, and thus by a mother and a father. Whether we know our parents and our ancestors or not, we are a part of a family, whose origins stretch back to the earliest days that humans walked the earth.

Every family is an extensive network of people, connected through time. Even though we may not have ever met our biological relatives, such as in adoptions or other situations where children are raised by those who are not blood relatives, we are a part of the biological family system that we were born into.

When there is an imbalance in the family system, due to trauma or to unhealthy beliefs transmitted to the members through the generations, it can create mental, emotional, physical and spiritual levels of suffering within the individual members, which then affects the family system as a whole.

Individual and Group Family Constellations sessions helps us see more clearly where we are stuck in old patterns that no longer serve us, and can offer us clues as to how we can dissolve unhealthy loyalties and help us embrace our present lives.

This brings healing and new energy not only to the individual who has requested a session, but to the entire family system.

During an individual or a group Family Constellation session, the client works with a trained facilitator to identify and explore their family system and try to identify where things may be imbalanced and out of order. This may involve using physical objects or, when doing group work, other participants to represent family members or ancestors. Through this process, the client gains insights into the dynamics and traumas within their family system, how these may be impacting their own life in the present, and what they can do to develop a healthier relationship with themselves and with their family systems.

Each figurine in the picture to the right represents a person or an element that is part of the problem the client presents.

By seeing the problem “outside”, and feeling what comes up by seeing the various elements “as they are”, the client can gain awareness into the hidden dynamics within a given situation, and how these dynamics are affecting them, and what they can do to deal with it in new, more loving and life-affirming ways.

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In synthesis, Family constellation work can help clients in a number of ways:

– to provide clarity and understanding about past experiences and patterns of behavior, allowing clients to break free from negative cycles in thought, feeling and behavior, and move towards more fulfilling relationships and life goals;

– to help clients heal from ancestral trauma and release negative emotions and relationship patterns such as unhealthy loyalties and entanglements, that have been passed down through generations. By becoming aware of these often hidden issues, clients can experience a greater sense of peace, purpose, and fulfillment in their lives.

Overall, Family Constellation work is a unique and powerful approach that can provide profound healing and growth for clients seeking a deeper understanding of themselves and their family system.

“The family system is a closed system. Once you are born into a family, it can never be different than what it is. This does not mean that you cannot be adopted into another family. It does not mean you will be bonded with the people in that family, but biologically, you are a part of this family system. The egg that you came from is the egg that you came from, the sperm that fertilized the egg is the sperm that fertilized that egg. This “point of origin” is just an objective fact, an impermeable truth.

Another truth about all human births is that you were born from the sperm of a man, and an egg of a woman. This is just a fact. It is not sexist, it is biology. Each of us does, in fact, come from a mother and a father. It is important to agree to life. Having a mother does not mean that one was nurtured or “mothered” by that person, and having a father does not mean that one has been nurtured or “fathered’ by that person. Some have endured very difficult fates as children and have been abused or neglected. But the fact remains that if one is alive, there was a mother and a father that contributed to that life. It is life that is acknowledged when there is nothing else. If your parents did not feed you and you are able to read this today, someone did feed you.

Sadly, if one is not able to be grateful for life itself, they may alternatively live their lives in rage, unconsciously punishing terrible parents with their own terrible life. This, in Family Constellations sometimes becomes illuminated. One then has a clear choice. Paradox is possible. “Thank you for my life. It is all that you gave me. What I do with my life is up to me. ”Paradox is painful, but honoring the paradox may be the only true reality that allow us to stand in a gentle and powerful way. If one was abused what is true might be, “You wronged me. And you gave me life. I will make something good of it.”

Francesca Mason Boring, Family Systems Constellations: And Other Systems Constellations Adventures: A transformational Journey, 2015, page 29-30.

Francesca Mason Boring

For more information on the in-person workshops Martha is now holding in Wisconsin, go to the Family Constellations Workshops page.

Individual Family Constellations sessions can be carried out either in person or online.

I am currently offering in-person Group Family Constellation workshops and you can check out this page for more info.

Questions? Send an email to martha@centerperson.org for more information and to set up your session today.

@Martha S. Bache-Wiig/ MBW LifeArt Consulting 2009-2024